We are there again

On the road of uncertainty

Never moving for a gain

What is it, I ask?

To wish or to live

To drive or to float

Endued with the task

Whether to stay or leave

What is the message?

Tired out already

In the dark skin of the night, enveloped with wonders of admiration: the star lit sky and reflection of my soul laying bare before my eyes. 

I do wonder sometimes if all I do is admire that which pleases my heart.  Is it courage I need or a bit of blemish. 

Maybe both alike, maybe none. 

All I know is whatever it is that happens, I can’t be appreciated. 

Why can’t I be appreciated? 

Ain’t I like the moon lit sky? 

Dark on the outside with a glamour of brightness reflected from the admirations of gentle souls

You can’t deal without me yet you yearn for another’s love   

I give you all the attention but that other’s name lights your spirit than I could ever do What is it we have exactly.

 I get confused sometimes, is it pity I ask myself.
 What we have is already something that is unique to me, new in fact. 
And apparently I’ve fallen too deep into the pit we’ve dug and now it looks like you look at me from above with laughter and scorn 

This is how I feel. I don’t want you to do anything about it cos it wouldn’t matter 
What is this, I ask myself 
What are we about?

HOW REAL?

Well I guess it’s called life. 
No matter what you do you can’t force such things on people. 
You’re the best thing that happened to me were your words and yet I’m only needed when you’re in need. 
I don’t even know what or how being happy with you is because all the time I feel your presence are the times there are tears. 
What is this, I ask myself. 
What are we about? 
But well, things don’t come as expected. 

What is the essence of the life we live? 
What is our purpose? 
Sometimes someone needs to write a manual about how you can live life without sorrow and pain. 
What brings you joy can change within a matter of seconds. 

I miss you, I really do but it seems you’re just not ready for this
It seems you just so much loved how I loved you
Love they say looks not with the eyes but with the mind
But it is without doubt that our minds aren't in sync.

Often times it ends up with us complaining because nobody did what anybody could have
What if all I have is myself. What if I end up the loner that I am. 
Not that it really matters now because all said here would however not reach you. But let me take my time and describe what it is I feel. 

I wish someone with a mind of “beauty is in the heart not the face” would find me because I’m becoming scared. 
Sometimes I hold back not because of anything but just this question, 
How proud is it you are to have me? 
How not bothered are you for looking just at my heart and not my appearance?
Because I know, trust me I do. 
Love and dating; I like to read about it and it’s fun to write about and to think about in my head but when it’s real, it’s scary. 

It’s okay to fear the answers but you just can’t avoid them
That brings us to the question; was this ever real?

ANEW

You care a little to much for me than you should

You pay attention to me than I thought you would

You cling to my heart as if that’s all you have

You are there, when I’m in trouble, to save

Could this be the love I always yearned for?

Is it possible I have yet I know not that I have?

When the world hails stones at me for my mistakes, you are there as my bulwark

When others see me as a disappointment, you look forward to my grandeur

Amidst all the shame I carry, you never pull back 

You make my nemesis fall in the pit they dug

You put the boundary lines in pleasant places for me

In wrong investments, you remind me of my delightful inheritance 

You make the earth quake and tremble just so to rid off my enemies

You draw me out of the deep waters and bring me to your light

How long will I wrestle my thoughts, I asked

You are my Lord, without you I have no good thing 

How precious I am to you is such a delight

You remember me not according to my iniquities but by your love

I love You, Lord, my strength 

My fortress and deliverer 

My rock and my refuge

THEOM

In an awe,
Darkness laid down unto her,
and resurrected blossoms that came from Heirs.
Darkness,
of all kinds,
were rings of love from her loosened hearts,
Hearts of spirits in gay,
somersaulting from the pumping part of her back.
Hearts that were followed by each epistles of her progenitors,
and hearts built beneath huts.
She's decorated hearts,
that were acts of arts.
A healer,
and witch to brag of.
The running wings,
and whispers from faith,
carved before the creation story
quackling from land to land on the knees of every man
were the tears,
of the dreamer in words.

And in crux,
was thy maker,
thy master,
and thy pilot
waited in ambush for his creature.

Rumbling and beating from the melody from her hut,
is an ode to be told
and the folded tear of her dream,
was a smile toppled before her.

Beneath her Maker,
Is every breathe from her heart,
her Hopes takes.
Her quiverful,
and better half,
she'd sacrificed,
her smile of three breathes,
and a rod she always clenched on.

On her knees to the future,
and the cost of every roar from her pain,
in soaked chains,
and a wet room,
with closed arms of an erected thumb to all.

She's of fetched hopes,
and a cloth of tomorrow's wonder land
wrapped around her,
and in gaze and panting thirst,
and her ring sworn unto,
on the altar before men and the laws,
is a cross of persecution before her head
and a garment of cries to carry before the land and all.

She's of no helper,
but fate,
that thy pilot,
would land her cloth of breathe and rod on safe.

Inside Out

This is love I swear
None like her anywhere
But I found her here

so long a time now I’ve been in the hiding
Cushioning myself from love
Harbouring it deep down
Responding not to any of its calling
Inside me I feel this crave
Shoving it I thought was best
Though it tingled for me to burst
All this time I’ve been standing on the edge
Below I knew was a beauty worth beholding
Elusive as it seemed scared me most
Liable to hurt, I decided to take my chances


as I stood in silence, in admiration of what you are
watching from afar yet close
I started to fall
the feeling from the start was frightening
but as the whisper grew stronger I felt exuberant
I had always wished for this day

When you feel too important
When your pride reaches the brim
And you take things for granted
Because you think you’re the best 

Idiotienship

You can be there with gleams of smiles on your face. 

And be laughing out loud. 

But you can’t trick me, you can’t lie to me because I know they’re all lies. 

Lies to me and everyone else. 

But then is it so important to lie to yourself? 

That you actually care? 

That you are who you say you are? 

Often times I see you trying to look all cool and calm but deep within, your emotions I know tell something else. 

You’re rapacious. 

You lied to me, in my face, one only could tell. 

You left me alone; now I feel like I'm in hell. 

If only,

The questions raised about us had made me think for a second. 

If only, 

Had I looked at possibilities 

If only,

Had I known it was staged

I wouldn’t have to pen these feelings down. Because they hurt. They really do.

Proud?

Have you ever imagined yourself at the point of death?
Have you felt death so close?
And suddenly, momentarily, you skip a heart beat?
The thought of you being erased from the surface of the earth is the scariest thing yet.
Like you mean I’d be gone?
Forgotten about?
Yet still the only thing that will suffice are memories?
Do you ever wonder who would cry?
Your so worked-hard-for possessions lying down
Do you ever wonder how it is like to be dead?
Do you ever wonder where you’d be after death?
Doesn’t the thought of life after death put you in a state of wonder?

O death,
Be ye not proud that you cause all these fears
O death,
Be ye not proud that you are inevitable
O death,
Be ye not proud that you make a heart lonely
O death,
Be ye not proud
Be ye not proud!

BestFriend

Who I am, no one really knows
I put up a mask of lies and hurt
Hoping no one will see through my disguise
No one knows except one

I met you as a stranger
Took you as a friend
I hope our long friendship
will never end.

Best Friend, the title we chose
Who are best friends really?
We should see us daily?
Well that's not true for us
Do little silly fights get in our way?
Oh if that's how it's meant to be

I don't have to be with you, to know you're there
We don't have to see each other, to know we care
We could be apart for years upon end,
And still remain best of friends.

I could skip  a heartbeat and still would survive
I could be in a car crash and still be alive
The clouds could fall out of the sky
The oceans could disappear and all turn dry
But the thought of you keeps me on

Secrets are traded
Privacy invaded
Somehow you never fail to impress.
I promise to do anything for it
I promise not rest until I'm there
I promise to take you with me.

Goodbye

Once upon a time I opened my heart to you
Once upon a time I allowed you to do as you pleased
Once upon a time I was the best thing in your life
Once upon a time there was nothing but us
I've tried so hard to understand, but I can't
I never wanted this to happen
But it looks like there's no other way
Nothing hurts more than the lie I believed
That you'd be my "happily ever after"
I wish my heart is melted so I no longer love you
I wish my memory is erased so I no longer think of you
I wish I could go far so I no longer see you
I want to cry but there's no more tear to shed
They say love is temporary
They say love lasts not eternally
I doubted
They say when love dies, love is born
I doubt it will
I guess I'll just close my eyes and let things fly and let the days pass me by.
I wish you knew how much you meant to me.

Beaten at Heart

I never imagined love finding me someday
Until your eyes locked with mine and I saw into your soul
You caught me off guard and took me by surprise
For a moment, I saw us lay underneath the moonlit sky, beneath a blanket of stars, hearing our hearts race
Now I wonder how I feel, these feelings scare me because it's new.
I want to tell you, believe me I've tried
But I guess I'm just your secret admirer
And I'll just admire from a distance

Listen O Ye Out There
If you see her
Better beware
She'll steal your heart unaware
This is LOVE, I swear
None like her anywhere.

Unknown Bars

Prisoners of our own creation.
We're Caught up With The Spirit Of Bars Who Imprisoned Our Souls.
We're Odd To Live as We Are
Ordained To These Works Of Art.
Silenced With Our Words and Bullied by our Actions.
Hatred in our Hearts
With no idea whom to Point.
Do we live our lives to be left in the end?
Caught behind bars of our Reflection.
Nothing to show the world.
But We're Of a Son and Two,
Who shines Like The Morning Dew.
From Our Generation We Add To You.
Pain and Struggles Of Today That Roars Like an Empire, We're Kings With No Crowns To Brag Of.
History Tells No Lies, We've Gained Nothing Behind Our Backs.
So We're To Die Young as Always As We Sleep.
Or Bow To The Fact That Our Ancestors Laid Their Lives For Us To Live.
So Tell Men To Run This Race as I Walk To See My Pilot, For The Night Is Of Terrors.
And I Hear The Dead Walking In Anger.


CW Jed

Undress Me.

Clothe Of Anger!
Undress Me, For Thy Breathe Is Of Pain and Heart Is Of Looping Tears. I Hear You're Of Great Wisdom, So Tell Me..
What's So Special Between a Red and Black Heart?
I Feel Pain Is Being Planted In My Night and I'm Too Weak To Walk In This Garden Of Harvest.
I'm To Pen My Feelings Here but I Doubt I'm Right On This.
I'll Walk Gently To Sleep and I Hope To See Thy Pilot In My Dreams.

Clothe Of Anger!
Fold Me Up To Tell My Story.
For Thy Innocent Soul Knows Nothing Of What it Embrace.
May Heavens Descend For Thy Good, For Sins Eat In Me.
I Know Nothing Of Hope, For Ye is a Grain Of Sand To Fetch.
I Know Thy Maker Hears Me.
And Thee Is Of No Smile To Put On thy Face.

Tenacious Hunt

What life confronts us with sometimes is beyond imagination
On the journey of life,
Many roads are long and winding
Filled with those who have lost their way
Those who believe Destiny put them where they are
Those who have no idea of their purpose
Those who just fill the space of matter
Some decide to force their course, guided by faith
Seeking not a location but a kindred soul
To save their world, to save the world
From the atrocities of life
To make life worth living
To survive

Nothing New Something Special

Should I to a summer's day?
Should I to the rythm of the traditional drum?
Should I to the sophisticated piano?
Should I to the sweet dreams?
Or to Romeo and Juliet?
What shall I compare thee to?
Rough winds shake the buds of summer.
Drum sticks break the skin of drums.
High pitches destruct the rhythm of the piano
Sweet dreams are reality nightmares.
Romeo and Juliet may become Othello and Desdemona
What if I compare thee to none?
What if I kept you dear?
What if I think you are incomparable?
What if I am sure you are?
Would you still be mine

WHAT HAVE WE TO LIVE FOR?

WHAT is the purpose of life?
HAVE we something to be here for?
WE are born into this world,
TO do what exactly?
LIVE to die, is that it?
FOR so long a time now
I always wondered if people also wondered
About what exactly our purpose was, is, and will be
What is the essence of the life circle?
What is the essence of life?
What is the essence of creation?
We fear DEATH. Death is what most would like to avoid
But the question is WHAT HAVE WE TO LIVE FOR?

WHAT ON EARTH IS WRONG?

....and it was good.
That starving baby
That discriminated toddler
That worried teen
That jobless graduate
That infertile woman
That crying husband
That wandering mad person
Is it a divine creation?
Or it was just a cosmic accident?
What is wrong on earth?
What have we to correct?
How can we make it good?
How can we bring back that which is lost?
How can we make creation the good it was?
What on earth is wrong?

Our Souls with Faith

We Stand Out Alone For What We Have Done.
Actions we've caused and Words we've Uttered out.
Why Dine With us?
Why Mock us?
We Emptied our Souls with Your Faith
We Covered our Faces with thy Sins.
Laid Down our Swords and Wives For You.
And Ignored The Cries of Our Children For Your Sake.

Let Us Rest In Peace Now.
For Thy Innocent Blood Haunts Us!
Let Us Restore Back The Old.
For We See No Light in the New.

We've Been Punished Drastically For Our
Actions.
We End This Life Here Today,For We're Blasphemed with it.
Bring Back The Old.
And Take the New Away.





Inspired by MisTer Jed

When shall I

Beauty in the Eyes not the heart.
Lead Me not into a cursed land.
But to take a path of unjust
Luck towards the road of broken hearts
Help Me Cure them.
For their blood is pure.
Raise their Kids into heirs of this land for it cries for help.
How I Watch and See These Rich Kids Play.
I'm Standing here in a room Full of oppressed people as Captives.
Where we've got nothing to show the world but then the world has us.
Swinging from up to down and running across the road of freedom.
Shall I be there one day to swing along as they do?
I've got my doll and parents with me
 and brethren from different locations watching and weeping in tears.
Then I ask Myself...
"When shall I be set free to sing with these kids as they do.
I'm here dreaming with my Eyes opened




Inspired by MisTar Jed